There are a few things that I need to get out of the way to start off this follow up review on Borderlands 2. First, I didn’t actually beat the game before I stopped playing. Secondly, and relevant to the first, I lost an incredibly high level character to the troublesome savegame UI. I have beef with the game’s solo play, and I’m gonna bitch about it, so ready up. Don’t worry, I’ll end on a good note.

The save UI is a little difficult to work with. By that I mean checking on another character’s items can somehow result in the last character you played getting overwritten. Two circumstances managed to end the game for me: The fact that I was literally one mission away from beating the game, and the fact that it took way too long to get to that point. I couldn’t tell you how many hours I dumped into that damned Siren, but I can tell you that I’m not terribly inclined to try making another one. Yeah, the code of couch buddies, but not everyone wants to play multiplayer all the time.

Next issue that’s more of a general complaint; nuking! Yes, yes, yes indeed. No matter what level you are, no matter how good your shield is, anything that isn’t a bandit peon or a smaller creature will probably dunk most of your essential to living points in a few hits. It goes without saying that boss enemies are guiltier of this than standard enemies, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be gunned down by some itty bitties.

Borderlands 2

I’m cool with the second wind system for the most part, but I can’t deny how fucking annoying it is to get downed in a crowd of enemies, only to have all of them run away while you’re pulling your missile launcher out. And each and every one of them will turn tail and run like you have the plague. The only reason I kept a missile launcher was because I didn’t want those cheeky sons of bitches to dash and cost me a tenth of my cash.

Ending on a good note, the banter and gun variety are pretty nice. That’s all there really is to say about that, because it doesn’t make up for the other parts of the game that are horribly, horribly lacking.

Actually, let’s end this on a bad note. The number of times I wound up pissed the fuck off at Borderlands 2 in relative to the total time it took to almost beat the game is completely out of proportion. The main reason I’m not going back to it is because of the relentless bullshit you have to deal with every goddamned mission. I mean, how the hell can you enjoy the banter and gun variety if every other minute you’re being murdered by a random Badass enemy or nicked by a stray bullet and left without anything to kill for second wind.

Borderlands 2

All of this is null and void if you stick to multiplayer, of course, so you can completely disregard this review if you’ve got a consistent couch buddy. The save UI could always use a little restructuring, considering it’s possible to lose characters to accidentally. That’s not exactly an in-game positive, considering wasting large amounts of the player’s time isn’t a way to encourage immersion and enjoyment. Just saying.


No alternate review this time around, because the Borderlands Bandwagon is far too large to tolerate any negative opinions that have yet to have been obliterated by thousands of contrary opinions. If you happen to be one of those people who loves Borderlands 2 to death, then please don’t bother “proving me wrong,” because everything I’ve said here is extremely subjective and entirely focused on single-player. That’s all there is to it, so enjoy. Or don’t. I almost enjoyed it, then it royally fucked me over.

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